Oscar? Grouch!

I used to care soooo much about the Oscars. I made sure I saw at least every best picture nominee, and as many of the best actor/actress nominees as I could, and maybe squeeze in the supporting cast or director awards. I figured out my own picks for the awards, tried to crystal-ball the ones that would actually win, crossed my fingers for my faves and cursed the Academy members for idiots when they didn't (but seriously...no to Goodfellas? C'mon, you dinks!).

Other than being happy for the folks who win -- with the exception of the odious Sean Penn, whose post-Spicoli work is dead to me because of his love for Venezuelan thug Hugo Chavez -- I don't much care who wins what anymore. Of the best picture nominees, I saw Slumdog Millionaire and The Curious Case of Benjamin Button. Slumdog was not bad, but Button was just a series of unconnected vignettes centering on Brad Pitt's face, frequently altered by computer-generated imagery. Neither was as good as The Wrestler or Gran Torino, neither of which were nominated.

I'm not sure why I lost interest. It may have had to do with the Academy's predisposition to nominate and award actresses who play hookers, strippers, emotionally disturbed characters and the like. Charlize Theron's 2003 turn as a serial killer prostitute was a lock. Women in positions of strength, power or leadership seem to fall by the wayside. And this year, supporting actress nominee Marisa Tomei played a stripper, while best actress winner Kate Winslet played a grown woman who seduced a teenage boy.

It may be that or it may be some other facet of the roles and movies the Academy chooses to honor that just turns me off. Or it may be that one day I realized the awards were just a very specialized popularity contest. We tend to think the Academy Awards represent some sort of absolute standard, simply because the people who vote on them are in that field. I'll go with that on a lot of the technical awards. But things like acting and directing are subjective matters, and that means I can judge for myself what kind of movies or performances I want to see and which ones I think are good. Matters of personal taste, liking or disliking a nominee, the political impact of a film or performance can play just as much a role in the opinions of Academy voters as they do in mine. And that means sometimes they make choices that plain flat-out reek (Crash? Dances With Wolves? Whoopi Goldberg? Mira Sorvino? Nicholas Cage? Cuba Gooding, Jr.? Titanic?)

The ratings for the Oscar telecast have been stinking for some time, which makes me think I may not be the only person asking, "Who cares?" Whether I am or not, I'm pretty sure that Hollywood isn't giving me any answer to that question. So congrats to the winners (except for you, Mr. Penn) and lets all of the rest of us cross our fingers that Academy voters will find a clue when they make out their ballots for the 2009 version of their awards. After all, it is the land of imagination out there, and a fella can dream, can't he?