Sunday, October 24, 2010

A Few Suggestions...

Our World Series this year will pit the Texas Rangers against the San Francisco Giants. Fans of the two teams traveling to each other's cities may require some pointers about the different cultures they encounter.

For Giants fans:
- Yes, people in Texas wear boots and leather chaps like many San Franciscans do. But they also wear pants with them.
- No, Barry, just because the Rangers are owned by a rancher does not mean they can supply you with bovine growth hormone so you can make a comeback.
- "Weed" is a plant you spray Round-Up on when it grows in your sidewalk.
- "Truckin'" is how they get around, not a song about what a long, strange trip it's been.
- A whole bunch of rodeo metaphors that can be thought of the wrong way when taken outside of their context but which are not exactly appropriate for this blog.

For Rangers fans:
-Yes, there is a bay just behind the stadium, and yes, they sell raw fish in the concession stands. But it's not bait, it's sushi. Leave the rods and reels in the truck.
- No, Tim Lincecum did not get his hair done at his sister's salon because he lost a bet with her. He seems to wear it that way by choice. And do not crowd the plate.
- Those are not model trains. They are streetcars, and people use them pretty frequently.
- While they may fall down when they're "tripping," do not be surprised if they look at the helping hand you extend them and ask why it's got green and purple flowers growing out of it.
- A whole bunch of rodeo metaphors that can be thought of the wrong way when taken outside of their context but which are not exactly appropriate for this blog.

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