The Wisconsin Badger, Taxidea taxus cheeseheadica, is an ill-tempered creature not known for its brainpower. It is given to ostentatious displays of irritability and petulance, frequently destroying others it confronts to such a degree as to render the contest outcome meaningless. Scientists theorize that this behavior may stem from the animal's shame over its preposterously small genitalia and dense, bone-heavy cranial structure.
When confronted by a Wisconsin Badger, one is advised to display either bratwurst, polka music, or the cheapest, nastiest beer available. Unable to focus on more than a handful of ideas at one time, the Wisconsin Badger is usually distracted by any one or a combination of these things.