Clean It Up

I'm not so sure what Tide detergent is selling.

The company has been advertising the product with commercials that focus on its new chemical process called "Acti-Lift," which is apparently very effective at removing stains. In one, a woman is at home when her daughter asks if she has seen a particular green shirt that the daughter wants to wear. In a flashback, we see the mom with her friends, dancing and spilling something on a rather ugly shirt. Gasp! It's the daughter's shirt, and the mom seems as unwilling to face the truth that she should apologize to her daughter for ruining it as she was to face the truth that she's a looooong way past her sell-by date for wearing a shirt like that. Fortunately, Mom has Tide with Acti-Lift and can wash the stain from the shirt without the daughter knowing and slip it back to her closet.

In another, a dad is a little unhappy with the length of skirt his teen daughter wants to wear, so he passively-aggresively gets it dirty, reasoning she will now no longer want to wear it and will opt for sensible skirts which conceal her behind. Fortunately, Mom has Tide with Acti-Lift and can wash the skirt clean as new, and she and daughter can share a knowing smile realizing they have once again foiled dumb ol' Dad's desire to have potential suitors become interested in his daughter's mind, character or personality instead of whether or not her stepping up a curb will display her underwear.

So the next time that you need a detergent which will enable you to lie to your children or encourage your daughter's desire to dress like a tramp, think Tide with Acti-Lift!