Apollo 13 commander Jim Lovell considered his mission -- in which a crippled spacecraft did not land on the moon as planned but did return its three astronauts safely to Earth -- a "successful failure."
A couple more successful failures are working to gather scientific knowledge right now. The former THEMIS P1 and P2 probes, in danger of shutting down because their orbits don't allow enough sunlight to their solar panels, have been redirected to study conditions around the moon instead. The THEMIS satellites are not technically a failure, because they worked in conjunction with the other probes in their five-spacecraft set to gather much of the data they were supposed to. But the change in their orbits over time left them in shadow too long for their systems to recover, and they were in danger of freezing out. Vassilis Angelopoulos of UCLA, principal investigator of the THEMIS mission, referred to them as "dead spacecraft walking," which is kind of a clunky phrase that draws on a 15-year-old movie title and shows that some folks aren't cut out for marketing.
Renamed the ARTEMIS mission, the two satellites will now explore the effect of solar wind on the moon and at the Earth-Moon Lagrange points. These are places in space where the gravitational interaction of the sun, moon and Earth combine to keep an object in one place relative to those bodies. A spacecraft in the Lagrange point would have to use very little fuel to keep its station, compared with one in some other position. Also, according to Messrs. Gibbons, Hill and Beard, "they gotta lotta nice girls there," although that idea "...might be mistaken."
Over on Mars, one of the two Spirit Rovers that have been tooling around the Barsoomian landscape since 2004 has found evidence of water that may have flowed underneath the Martian surface. Again, the rovers are not truly failures, as they have been working several years past their initial three-month mission plans. But the Spirit rover got stuck in some Martian sand a few months ago and is in a hibernation mode while it awaits the Martian spring and maybe gets some sun on its own solar panels and can get working again.
But before it shut down, it sent data that showed strata, or layers, in the Martian soil that suggests snowmelt flowed underneath the top crust not very long ago. If Spirit survives the bitter cold of the Martian winter and does begin to operate again, scientists plan to test several things about the soil around it that can be done without getting the little goldbrick to up and move again.
Sunday, November 21, 2010
Saturday, November 20, 2010
You Can't Spell Evil Without an "IL"
Evil doesn't always mean stupid.
Sometimes Sauron posts a guard on the slopes of Mt. Doom. Sometimes Voldemort hires a thug to run Harry down with a car during the summers he's at the Dursleys. Sometimes Blofeld pops a cap in 007 instead of trying to burn him up with a rocket or something. Sometimes Ming just runs for office instead of trying to conquer the Earth. And sometimes the Illini remember to bring a ground game.
A career performance by Illini back Mikel Leshoure gave the vile venom of the prairie a 48-27 win in the game, played at Wrigley Field for the first time since the 1930s. Concerns about player safety meant that only one end zone was used for the game, as the other was deemed too close to the wall.
Rumors of human sacrifices made to insure the Illini win are, of course, unfounded.
Sometimes Sauron posts a guard on the slopes of Mt. Doom. Sometimes Voldemort hires a thug to run Harry down with a car during the summers he's at the Dursleys. Sometimes Blofeld pops a cap in 007 instead of trying to burn him up with a rocket or something. Sometimes Ming just runs for office instead of trying to conquer the Earth. And sometimes the Illini remember to bring a ground game.
A career performance by Illini back Mikel Leshoure gave the vile venom of the prairie a 48-27 win in the game, played at Wrigley Field for the first time since the 1930s. Concerns about player safety meant that only one end zone was used for the game, as the other was deemed too close to the wall.
Rumors of human sacrifices made to insure the Illini win are, of course, unfounded.
Friday, November 19, 2010
Weeellll, Maybe, But I'm Not Sure...
According to "insiders," Dancing With the Stars producers are worried that if Sarah Palin's daughter Bristol wins, the show will be ruined.
Someone named Rob Shuter, writing for something called "PopEater," ferreted out the truth, granting anonymity to his sources...for no good reason I can see, except maybe to be able to make the claim he has sources, or maybe so those sources can protect their jobs, which might be endangered by airing such sentiments in Palin-loving Hollywood.
If you're unfamiliar with DWTS, it takes some people who may have been stars of some kind or another at one time, including athletes or reality TV folks or minor celebrities, and pairs them with professional dancers who will work on routines with them. A panel of dance and choreography experts judges the performances and gives their scores, and then telephone lines are opened so that fans can vote for their favorite. A percentage of the phone votes is combined with the judges scores to make a final total, and the lowest score goes home. A performance ranked low by the judges might not be a problem if the celebrity has a large enough fan base, and someone whom the judges scored better may go home instead.
According to Shuter, "(O)ne TV insider" said if Bristol wins, "Any creditability the show had will be over."
I do not believe that looks to be a substantial loss.
Someone named Rob Shuter, writing for something called "PopEater," ferreted out the truth, granting anonymity to his sources...for no good reason I can see, except maybe to be able to make the claim he has sources, or maybe so those sources can protect their jobs, which might be endangered by airing such sentiments in Palin-loving Hollywood.
If you're unfamiliar with DWTS, it takes some people who may have been stars of some kind or another at one time, including athletes or reality TV folks or minor celebrities, and pairs them with professional dancers who will work on routines with them. A panel of dance and choreography experts judges the performances and gives their scores, and then telephone lines are opened so that fans can vote for their favorite. A percentage of the phone votes is combined with the judges scores to make a final total, and the lowest score goes home. A performance ranked low by the judges might not be a problem if the celebrity has a large enough fan base, and someone whom the judges scored better may go home instead.
According to Shuter, "(O)ne TV insider" said if Bristol wins, "Any creditability the show had will be over."
I do not believe that looks to be a substantial loss.
Thursday, November 18, 2010
There's Treasure Everywhere
And twenty-five years ago today, we got to start looking for it in the middle of cardboard-box-based transmogrifiers and time machines, daydream-spawned space heroes and private eyes, an army of deranged mutant killer monster snow goons and a tuna-fish sandwich trap that captured one homicidal psycho jungle cat.
It was a good ten years.
It was a good ten years.
Hello, I Must Be Going
Some British researchers have done some puzzling over a proposed "invisibility cloak" and have theorized a way that it might be even cooler -- if that's possible.
This "4D" version of the cloak would not only use an exotic substance called "metamaterial" to bend light waves around the covered object and make it impossible to see, they would also use some of their other wild properties to somehow manipulate time itself, which would allow whatever they were covering to disappear from one place and simultaneously reappear somewhere else.
The only problem right now is that this "metamaterial" exists in very small amounts and the speed of light would require an immense amount of stuff to work. Light travels at 186,000 miles per second, and in order to displace things one second, you would need a cloak of metamaterial 186,000 miles thick. And yes, that would definitely make you look fat, so don't even ask.
Lead researcher Martin McCall disagrees, saying that even current fiber-optic technology could create a sort of practice cloak that would demonstrate the proof of the concept and get scientists a-crackin' on making the real thing. My guess is that we would see the lead in this project being taken by high school science whizzes who would never never never never never never never use a working invisibility cloak to camp inside the girls' locker room with the highest megapixel resolution video camera they could get their hands on.
Never.
This "4D" version of the cloak would not only use an exotic substance called "metamaterial" to bend light waves around the covered object and make it impossible to see, they would also use some of their other wild properties to somehow manipulate time itself, which would allow whatever they were covering to disappear from one place and simultaneously reappear somewhere else.
The only problem right now is that this "metamaterial" exists in very small amounts and the speed of light would require an immense amount of stuff to work. Light travels at 186,000 miles per second, and in order to displace things one second, you would need a cloak of metamaterial 186,000 miles thick. And yes, that would definitely make you look fat, so don't even ask.
Lead researcher Martin McCall disagrees, saying that even current fiber-optic technology could create a sort of practice cloak that would demonstrate the proof of the concept and get scientists a-crackin' on making the real thing. My guess is that we would see the lead in this project being taken by high school science whizzes who would never never never never never never never use a working invisibility cloak to camp inside the girls' locker room with the highest megapixel resolution video camera they could get their hands on.
Never.
Being Helpful
With all of the fussin' and stuff going on over the Transportation Security Administration's new scanners and very friendly pat-down procedures, some novel ideas have surfaced for ways in which airline passengers can assist the TSA in making their jobs easier and our flying safer.
1. Offer them audible indicators of your thanks for the thoroughness of their pat-down. Although we might think that the agents eagerly await the opportunity to grope attractive passengers, we have to realize that those selected for the pat-down are chosen at random and that somewhere, some poor TSA agent is going to have to search Ed Asner. Making like Meg Ryan in Katz's Deli is a way to let them know we appreciate their sacrifice.
2. Wear only a Speedo or other swimsuit-like garment that offers them unobstructed view of the areas where most persons might try to smuggle in harmful items. This is especially useful if you are a person who may be carrying some extra weight around that might mean traditional clothes have extra room for contraband. This tactic is not recommended if you are flying in winter or headed to a northern city.
3. In a similar vein, if you are a man, wear a kilt. I made this suggestion when talking to our church's youth director, who had the bonus idea that, when being patted down, it would be a good time to channel your inner Braveheart and shout, "You can feel my thighs! But you can never take my freedom!" While I think that kid may be going places, I also have to caution that taking this action may definitely cause TSA agents and airport security to take your freedom, so you may want to stop with just the kilt.
If these invasive techniques could be demonstrated to make flying safer, I'm sure that I and others would have less trouble with them. But of course, a scanner that sees through clothes but not inside the body can't detect explosives or other contraband inside the body. And a pat-down search won't find them either. I am in no way any kind of security expert, so there are probably a lot of different factors I'm overlooking. But I'm wondering if it ought to make us curious, at least, that El Al, the national airline of Israel, doesn't employ body scanners or pat downs and yet has not had a hijacking. Why have they had success? Could their techniques be duplicated?
Again, I don't know, but it doesn't seem like those questions have been asked during the time the TSA was awarding lucrative contracts for purchasing the scanners from companies with some well-connected lobbyists. The question that has been asked -- and you can determine for yourself if you think it's been answered and how -- is, "Can flying today stink any worse?"
1. Offer them audible indicators of your thanks for the thoroughness of their pat-down. Although we might think that the agents eagerly await the opportunity to grope attractive passengers, we have to realize that those selected for the pat-down are chosen at random and that somewhere, some poor TSA agent is going to have to search Ed Asner. Making like Meg Ryan in Katz's Deli is a way to let them know we appreciate their sacrifice.
2. Wear only a Speedo or other swimsuit-like garment that offers them unobstructed view of the areas where most persons might try to smuggle in harmful items. This is especially useful if you are a person who may be carrying some extra weight around that might mean traditional clothes have extra room for contraband. This tactic is not recommended if you are flying in winter or headed to a northern city.
3. In a similar vein, if you are a man, wear a kilt. I made this suggestion when talking to our church's youth director, who had the bonus idea that, when being patted down, it would be a good time to channel your inner Braveheart and shout, "You can feel my thighs! But you can never take my freedom!" While I think that kid may be going places, I also have to caution that taking this action may definitely cause TSA agents and airport security to take your freedom, so you may want to stop with just the kilt.
If these invasive techniques could be demonstrated to make flying safer, I'm sure that I and others would have less trouble with them. But of course, a scanner that sees through clothes but not inside the body can't detect explosives or other contraband inside the body. And a pat-down search won't find them either. I am in no way any kind of security expert, so there are probably a lot of different factors I'm overlooking. But I'm wondering if it ought to make us curious, at least, that El Al, the national airline of Israel, doesn't employ body scanners or pat downs and yet has not had a hijacking. Why have they had success? Could their techniques be duplicated?
Again, I don't know, but it doesn't seem like those questions have been asked during the time the TSA was awarding lucrative contracts for purchasing the scanners from companies with some well-connected lobbyists. The question that has been asked -- and you can determine for yourself if you think it's been answered and how -- is, "Can flying today stink any worse?"
Wednesday, November 17, 2010
羔羊中的孤羊 (Motherless Goats of All Motherless Goats!)
I have elsewhere noted my love for the brief run of Joss Whedon's Western-styled sci-fi series Firefly, and recently learned of a handy reference page for show watchers. Whedon's universe had English as its major spoken language, but Mandarin Chinese also played a role in people's everyday speech. For the crew of the good ship Serenity and the shady characters they sometimes encountered, that role was most often profanity.
The good folk at Topless Robot have compiled the 15 best Chinese curses uttered during the show; the title of this post comes in at No. 5 (Caution: The Topless Robot people wield a free-range vocabulary). Apparently, for most of these, the episode writer would dream up a wacky phrase that they wanted to be used as a curse word, and then a woman who worked for the show and translated things to Mandarin so the actors could speak it properly would then render it into that language. So few Mandarin speakers who are not also fans of Firefly would understand why you suddenly tossed "Gao yang jong duh goo yang" into the conversation, unless you happened to be talking about cloned goats instead of naturally-conceived ones.
I might also note that the people who voted in the survey mentioned in yesterday's post did not see fit to include Firefly as one of those shows, so I can only conclude that each of them is a perfect bun tyen-shung duh ee-dway-ro.
(H/T Opuszine)
The good folk at Topless Robot have compiled the 15 best Chinese curses uttered during the show; the title of this post comes in at No. 5 (Caution: The Topless Robot people wield a free-range vocabulary). Apparently, for most of these, the episode writer would dream up a wacky phrase that they wanted to be used as a curse word, and then a woman who worked for the show and translated things to Mandarin so the actors could speak it properly would then render it into that language. So few Mandarin speakers who are not also fans of Firefly would understand why you suddenly tossed "Gao yang jong duh goo yang" into the conversation, unless you happened to be talking about cloned goats instead of naturally-conceived ones.
I might also note that the people who voted in the survey mentioned in yesterday's post did not see fit to include Firefly as one of those shows, so I can only conclude that each of them is a perfect bun tyen-shung duh ee-dway-ro.
(H/T Opuszine)
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